Miss Manners: My online photo ban draws a confounded response

DEAR MISS MANNERS I occasionally enjoy having lunch at a restaurant with a group of longtime friends All is well until the time comes when they want to take a group photo which of syllabus gets posted on Facebook Related Articles Miss Manners I think it s hurtful to ban children from weddings Our pediatrician agrees Miss Manners My grandson calls this woman Nonna and I m not OK with that Miss Manners I d been growing my hair out and the barber blithely chopped it off Miss Manners Is it narcissistic to display a studio portrait of oneself in the home Miss Manners I was criticized for holding the elevator for a woman in the hall I do not post on social media I do not want my life in words nor photos posted So I quietly say I ll back out of camera range as I don t want a picture of me posted online I get looks like I m from another planet How do I respond to these looks And just as bad how do I respond to people who post my photo without permission GENTLE READER Move to Dubai Apparently there you must ask for permission before taking a photo Good manners would dictate the same in our country but since it is not punishable by law no one adheres to it Miss Manners is working on that In the meantime ignore the looks and ask your friends to take down the photos It is they who are being rude not you DEAR MISS MANNERS I have been frequenting a pub for a while now My favorite bartender is very kind and perpetually gets me my favorite drink I don t drink alcohol which she knows and I make sure to drink enough nonalcoholic beverages for her to earn a profit The dilemma is she regularly provides me with free alcohol shots Is there any way to stop her GENTLE READER Kindly ask her not to Remind her that you do not drink but that you are more than happy to join her with shots of juice or anything else she has lying around except Miss Manners warns the contents of the bar mat DEAR MISS MANNERS After a friend pointed out how often I talk over other people I ve been working to rein in this bad habit In my personal life this has gone well At work it has been harder I m frequently in meetings where a colleague is so long-winded or so far off-topic that if someone doesn t interrupt and redirect them we aren t able to finish the business at hand Almost as often the person running the meeting is in a rush and moves on from a topic too hastily before I ve gotten the information I need Here if I don t interrupt and ask them to back up I have to schedule another meeting to follow up which is annoying for everyone Related Articles Dear Abby My husband s negativity is dragging me down with him Asking Eric I feel like I should summary my neighbor before he hurts someone Harriette Cole Should I tell the bride why I m uneasy Miss Manners I think it s hurtful to ban children from weddings Our pediatrician agrees Dear Abby Because of what was stated in the group text my sister ditched half our family Assuming in both cases the speaker doesn t pause ask questions or take a breath how can I help guide these conversations without interrupting GENTLE READER You could raise your hand Although a bit school-ish and annoying it will get the point across without actual interruption Or you could preempt those speakers prone to reciting monologues by asking if there will be time for questions afterwards But Miss Manners does not entirely object to asking to schedule another meeting While inconvenient it has the advantage of likely only having to occur once to be effective Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website www missmanners com to her email gentlereader missmanners com or through postal mail to Miss Manners Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO